"LIL: *pokes head put from under bed & whispers* Psssst! Psssst! Mum! Where is ... y'know ... It?
ME: Out for a walk with Daddy.
LIL: *halfway out from under bed* So it's safe? I mean, I can come out and *shudders* It won't wag threateningly at me from a safe distance.
ME: No, it's all clear, you can come and cuddle Mummy in bed.
LIL: *snorts with derision* Are you having a laugh? I'm still furious with you, woman. Nope, what I need is a piss, really quite urgently!"